It's all about the Pentiums

I’ve created a monster. You know, I didn’t get the internet until I was 16. And then it was dial-up at 28.8bps. And the only good site was adamsandler.com. I don’t think the real Adam Sandler ran it, just some dude who wanted to post… pictures. Anyway, that’s not important right now. What matters is that we only have the one computer, so while Matador browses a Super Mario Wonder wiki, I’m stuck here twiddling my thumbs and wishing I could take a phone off the hook so the internet goes away.