Elaine’s About to Die


It's always awkward to join a new group. Worse, most adults experience this in a fitness setting: Camp Gladiator, Soul Cycle, Orange Theory, and the like. What do you say to people at six in the morning who just want to get in their workout and get out? Well, if you're awkward man-child Daniel Verastiqui, sometimes you say Elaine's about to die. And sometimes, you say it to the woman standing...

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